Back To Their Roots: MTV To Air Music Videos From 2:17AM To 2:22AM Every Tuesday
Los Angeles, CA- After a continued 20-year downward spiral in the ratings category, MTV is taking it back to their roots. The once...
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offendedamerican24
May 301 min
Chicago Mayor Proposes Giving Homeless Weed So They Can Spend All Their Money On Alcohol
Chicago, Ill- As Lori Lightfoot makes her way out of her seat as mayor of Chicago, this other guy is coming in with lofty goals not even...
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offendedamerican24
May 301 min
Gen Z-er Decries Sheltered Childhood: “I Didn’t Even Know What A Trans Person Was Until I was 6”
Eugene, OR- A 20-year-old liberal college student from the University of Oregon named Taven Hawkins made a viral announcement on his...
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offendedamerican24
May 302 min
Ed Sheeran Pleads Not Guilty To Plagiarism, Yet Found Guilty Of Making Shitty Music
Suffolk, U.K.- In an ongoing lawsuit concerning Ed Sheeran and his plagiarism of the famous sexual tune, “Let’s Get It On” written by Ed...
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offendedamerican24
May 302 min
Coming Soon: Woke Version Of Willy Wonka To Be Named Tyrone And The Cracker Factory
Hollywood, CA- In the light of successful recent releases that feature African-American in lead roles, such as Wakanda Forever and Black...
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offendedamerican24
May 302 min
Celebrities Lose Blue Checks On Twitter, Still Have Herpes
Los Angeles, CA- You can’t have everything in the world, right? As entitled celebrities have pouted for the last few months about ‘losing...
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offendedamerican24
May 302 min
In Last Ditch Effort, Bed Bath And Beyond To Rebrand To Bed Black And Beyond
Union, NJ- As the company continues to struggle, Bed Bath and Beyond is taking drastic measures to try and stay afloat. The shares for...
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offendedamerican24
May 302 min
Man Pulled Over After Drinking At Applebee’s Arrested For Crime Of Eating At Applebee’s
Lufkin, TX- It wasn’t how Martin Friedman thought his Friday night would end last week. It started out just like any other Friday for...
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offendedamerican24
May 302 min
Tour de France To Feature Motorcyclist That Identifies As Bicyclist
France- In an attempt to ensure the same inclusivity as women’s sports in America, the Tour de France proudly announced this morning that...
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offendedamerican24
May 301 min
American Progressives Upset With Lack Of Diversity On Chinese Sports Teams
Chicago, Ill- Livid social justice warriors were lined up in front of the Consulate General of The People’s Republic of China in Chicago...
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offendedamerican24
May 301 min
Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre Reveals Small Village Of Gnomes That Have Nested In Her Hair
Washington, DC- After being absent from her job for a few days last week, Press Secretary has returned to dodging questions about our...
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offendedamerican24
May 291 min
Army Of AI Bots That Look Like Greta Thunberg Being Developed To Destroy Humanity
Silicon Valley, CA- Disturbing developments coming out of Silicon Valley this week as reports that some rogue AI developers have left...
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offendedamerican24
May 292 min
Dude Drinking Bud Light With His Bros Suddenly Realizes He Might Be A Woman
Eugene, OR- Bradley Dawson had a fun weekend with his bros planned last week when things took a dramatic turn as he took a sip out of his...
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offendedamerican24
May 291 min
Lia Thomas’s Gynecologist Unsure How To Examine Lia’s Testicles, Scrotum, And Penis
Philadelphia, PA- Lia Thomas, the dominant male swimmer competing against females, decided since he was pretending to be a woman that he...
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offendedamerican24
May 292 min
Easter Bunny Teams Up With Trans Activist To Remind Kids That Rabbits Can Lay Eggs
Palo Alto, CA- Everyone seems to be jumping on the trans bandwagon this week as social media dude that claims to be a girl, Dylan...
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offendedamerican24
May 292 min
Homeless San Francisco Man Lists Tent On AirBNB
San Francisco, CA- As the homeless crisis continues to get worse in San Francisco, a local vagrant has found a way to beat the system and...
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offendedamerican24
May 292 min
After Outlawing Stoves, New York Governor Plans To Ban Cars When Notified They Can Be Deadly
New York, New York- It’s been a whirlwind month for New York governor Kathy Hochul. The first-term governor has been bombarded with...
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offendedamerican24
May 292 min
Broke: Kaepernick Returns To San Francisco To Collect Reparations
San Francisco, CA- The world has thankfully heard very little from Colin Kaepernick lately– until late last week. Kaepernick had...
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offendedamerican24
May 292 min
As More Americans Go Missing In Mexico, Biden Suggests Building Border Wall
Del Rio, TX- President Joe Biden took an unexpected trip to the Texas/Mexico border this week to assess exactly how Americans are...
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offendedamerican24
May 292 min
Zuckerberg Promises He’ll Be Your Friend If Someone Would Just Come Hang Out With him In The Metaverse
Metaverse- For someone who has as much money as Mark Zuckerberg, you would think it would be easy to make friends, right? Well, think...
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