Biden To Deliver State Of The U.N. Address Tonight

Washington D.C.- The world waits in anticipation for the President's first ever state of the United Nations speech tonight, a move the Biden administration thinks will put the world on the right track to becoming a one-world order. 

“We’re replacing McCarthys’s seat with President Zelenskyy to show our solidarity with Ukraine,” Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre explained, “We want the world to know that we all stand with Ukraine and the United Nations.” When asked why there would be no State of the Union addressed specifically to the United States, Jean-Pierre flipantly responded with, “Out with the old and in with the new,” apparently referencing a new world order that doesn’t include the U.S.

“We need to progress forward, not backward,” she said, “And we all know that there is too much stain on the history of America so we are just going to move forward from here.” She was then questioned about exactly what the Biden administration planned to do to “move forward.” “Well, that is going to be addressed in the President’s speech this evening,” Jean-Pierre said, “He will lay out a very progressive plan to create a cohesive United Nations that will be inclusive to all countries, nationalities, and cultures– except Russia, we still want to go to war with Russia for sure.”

The Press Secretary and others within the Biden administration are confirming that the President will not address concerns over inflation or possible Chinese action after a Chinese balloon was caught in U.S. airspace over the weekend. “No, we aren’t going to focus on the negatives tonight,” said a spokesman for the administration, “We are simply going to enjoy the potential for the United Nations to become what we’ve all hoped it could be.”

The administration is definitely not holding anything back with the announcement of the first-ever State of the U.N. speech given by a sitting President. Let us know your thoughts in the comments! And stay with The Offended American, where today’s jokes are tomorrow’s news.